Monthly Archives: October 2008

The Stirrings (snicker).

October 30, 2008
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We’re reading The Giver now. “This book is weird.” “Duh. I told you that before I handed it out. For you guys, if it isn’t weird, it’s ‘boring.’” I was waiting for the, “It’s weird and boring,” but it didn’t come. Phew. Last year was the first year I taught it, and I didn’t even finish it out, because I had a student teacher last year, and she took over after chapter 6 or so. So, this is virgin (snicker) territory for me. It’s kind of fun figuring things out for the first time, and I really like this book. I love blowing their minds. (If you have any groovy ideas or suggestions, I’m all ears, as they used to say.) Related aside: If you have time and the inclination, check out We by Yevgeny Zamyatin. It was supposedly the inspiration for Orwell’s 1984, Vonnegut’s Player Piano, and The Giver. I really enjoyed it. But I’m a sucker for those crazy Russian writers. Tuesday, we had read where Lily was wishing she could be assigned to be a Birthmother. After the sadness that nobody got to be with their “real” parents, the giggles started in about Lily’s vision of the

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Oh, of course!

October 27, 2008
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As we have seen, the seventh grade mind works in mysterious ways. Last week left us pondering seventh grade translations for the euphemism, “vertically challenged.” In addition to the correct response, short, and many silly ones (retarded? stupid?), we also received three sincere, mystery responses: hard, clumsy, and gay. Here are the kids’ explanations: Hard – “Well, if something is vertical, it’s high, so it’s hard to get over. So it’s hard. So, see…” Hmmm. Why do all explanations like this begin with the word well, and have lots of so’s in them? Clumsy – “Well, you know, if you have a hard time staying vertical, you’re clumsy right? Always falling down? Not vertical any more.” This one isn’t bad. I think I gave it to her. Gay – “Well, if you’re not straight…you’re gay, right?” Who am I to argue with logic like that? I asked the girl in the afternoon who had also said gay. She said that was what she was thinking too. Of course. More follow up and suchlike. And some actual talk about the namesake of this blog. We finished The Outsiders. We read chapter 12 together, and there are almost as many tears during

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Let’s Play: Can You Understand a Seventh Grader?

October 23, 2008
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The last one was easy. Let’s really up the ante. We’ll have three rounds. Go! Today we were talking about euphemisms. I’m starting to get them ready to read The Giver. (I’ll be talking soon enough about the end of The Outsiders and starting up the new novel. Dunno how that slipped by.) After explaining and exampling and such, I gave them seven examples to try to translate. The last one was “vertically challenged.” “What do we have for this one?” “Retarded.” “VERTICALLY challenged, not mentally.” “How about, stupid?” “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.” (Oh, sweet irony.) “Hard.” 1. OK. For one point, explain her thinking. “What? Ummm…no.” “Midget!” “Closer. A midget could be called vertically challenged, but not vice versa.” “I was thinking clumsy.” 2. For two points, explain that one. “Interesting idea…but no.” “Short!” Woo hoo. Finally. I had watched a “vertically challenged” girl get all excited when she thought she had the answer to this one, and write it down quickly. But we got to “short” before I called on her. After all the nonsense answers I can’t remember, and the finishing up with that one, I noticed she looked a little down. I

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You Gotta Have a Shtick (or a stick).

October 22, 2008
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You Gotta Have a Shtick (or a stick).

One of the things I like to say about teaching junior high is down at the bottom of this page in the footer. You’re too lazy to scroll, aren’t you? Fine. “Five shows a day, 180 days a year.” And there aren’t many crowds tougher than 7th graders. “This is boring.” The worst of all sins. Most of us who teach junior high have a shtick. A role we play, some isms we like to use again and again. Idiosyncrasies we play up for entertainment/attention value (oh the sharing I get when we talk about that word idiosyncrasy during “Monsters are Due on Maple Street“). The key is to make the shtick such a natural part of the classroom routine, that it doesn’t distract too much. Well, sometimes we need the distraction. There’s the Raffle King. There’s the Timer. There are the clickers. The Cage. Mental Floss. Nutty videos. MYOB. All of these are stalwart features of my classroom shtick. And as of a few years ago, there’s also the Quiet Stick. (four or five years ago – me visiting another teacher’s classroom before school) “Leenie! What the shiggy are you doing? Where’d you get this, and WHY ARE YOU

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A First!

October 20, 2008
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This afternoon, I asked my friend and colleague, in his experiences with junior high, how many times he could remember seeing two seventh grade boys hugging. Sincerely. “Like a man-hug, or a real one?” “What’s a man hug?” “You know, you start out with the soul shake, and then you pull in and sorta bump chests, and then the other hand sorta slaps the back.” “Not that kind.” “Ummm. None.” “I knew it. It was a first for me too!” Milk and Cheese, the “True That” boys, were at it again. They were moving their desks closer together (again), like they like to do, and jabbering nonsense. Nothing major, and technically it was before class, but I said, “Well the quarter does end Friday, and I change up the seating chart every quarter, so next week I get to move you guys far, far apart.” One of our recent vocabulary words was crestfallen. I should have taken a picture of them to use as an example. Milk holds out both arms pleadingly (and it if it wasn’t sincere, he should be an actor) and says, “But…But…But… What about The Team?” OMG. The class is dying. Half of them are happy

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Random Featured Post

True That.

We had an open mouth quiz on chapter 8 today. One class has several boys who have a new phrase they’re trying out. Personally, I sort of like it. 4) On p127, we get an example of what seems to be foreshadowing. What is it? a) When Two-Bit says that Darry will kill him if Pony’s really sick. b) When Two-Bit says Darry could be a Soc. c) When Pony says he has a helpless feeling. d) When Two-Bit calls Pony chicken. e) When Pony says he’ll be well by tonight. “OK, number four. What’s foreshadowing?” The class takes care of that one for me. Most of them laugh, and one says, “I was wrong.” (Pony’s line at the end of chapter three, and a beauty example for them of foreshadowing.) “Oh yeah. Ok, so it’s C, right?” “True that.” “Number six. Darry, I mean Dally (they always mix up those names), right?” “True that.” (me, doing some “refocusing” of a gentleman off to the side) “‘Clark,’ could you focus your comments on the questions? Open mouth only applies if that mouth is talking about the questions.” “True that.” “And I think we’re done with that line, for today at [...]

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Mr. Coward has been teaching on the beautiful central coast of California since 1989.

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Recent Comments

  • mrC commented on It’s Go Time!@Sarah-Most excellent! Keep up the good work, and don't let any of them talk you out of it. Glad to hear your kids recognize the value too. Fight the good fight!
  • Mrs. M~ commented on Illin’Feel better soon! There is nothing worse than being at school and trying to be "on" when you feel like death.
  • Sarah commented on It’s Go Time!I just came across your blog...I am a second year teacher and I am currently reading The Outsiders aloud to my seventh graders. I read it to them last year, too. I catch a lot of criticism for reading it to them...but they LOVE to have me read to them. I actually had a group
  • joan commented on Illin’I'm on day two of out-with-the-crud. I needed the rest. Hope you're in tip top shape by Monday!
  • mrC commented on “The Sub Used One of Your Sticks!”That one oughta be strung up like they used to do to horse thieves.
  • Heather commented on “The Sub Used One of Your Sticks!”The last sub I had left no note at all and broke the arm of my spinny chair by leaning back in it so far that he fell in the floor. The kids all said he was the best sub ever. I politely asked the school secretary to never have him sub in
  • mrC commented on The Future of Space Travel@Heather: Gawd I hate that. I think I even posted about it awhile back. @Kelli: This reminds me of high school. I went to a Jesuit high school (all boys) and for our Friday football rallies, we would import cheerleaders from other schools to be a part of the rally. And the girls would always begin
  • Heather commented on The Future of Space TravelMy eighth graders just have the habit of prefacing every question with, "I have a question." And announcing "I'm done" when they complete an assignment.
  • Kelli commented on The Future of Space TravelIs it bad that I sometimes start my stories with "Okay, so...."...? I guess the kids have rubbed off on me. Sigh.
  • Kelli commented on Blogging the Scoring Session (Part I)Ugh! Been there. I have been to those "Scoring and Rubric" type meetings in two different states now... Not fun, and not entirely informative, either.
  • Meg commented on No Groove Yet (Also: The Giver and No Homework Returns)There was a district I student taught in that hand the no fail policy. I child could not be held back a grade, even if they did absolutely nothing the whole year, until they were in high school. It took most of the middle schoolers about 3 seconds to realize they didn't have
  • Kelli commented on No Groove Yet (Also: The Giver and No Homework Returns)You know, that whole "no-zero" policy goes hand-in-hand with the "no-failure" or "no-retention" policy, and my school district is a definite contributor to this madness. I can understand the desire to stop giving zeros and MAKE the kids do the work (giving countless opportunities until successful), but I have been in a situation where
  • commented on Obligatory Santa VideoWe have an unofficial "no zero" policy. It takes a little extra effort on the teacher's part to get all of the students to complete their assignments but we have made it work. The thing that was most helpful was instituting a "homework detention" that is separate from discipline detention. If a

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