Follow up

Follow Up

October 17, 2011
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First off, the Standing Girl actually took a break on Thursday. “I just don’t feel like standing today.” “No sore toe?” “No. I just don’t feel like it.” OK. Friday was test day–she doesn’t stand for tests–but she was right back on her feet today. “I just feel like it.” One of the yahoos spoke my own thoughts today, though perhaps a bit less tactfully. “Can’t you think of anything else to say? Maybe Iiiii feel like, you know…far-” “Quiet you!” Second, another round of kudos to the brave Mr. M. He threw himself on the landmine, and it didn’t blow up. The not-missus (I couldn’t resist) was dead-on when she said that we teachers are a defensive bunch. In fact, that was my cooperating teacher’s only real beef with me as a young buck: “Does not take criticism well.” Ouch. The truth hurts, as we used to say in junior high. So Mr. M,  it took a lot of guts for you to approach your colleague, AND you obviously had some tact, because she actually listened to you. That’s a one-two punch you gotta take advantage of. What else needs changing at your school? You should be working that

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Be-er?

March 19, 2011
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I’m going to try to tie together a couple of loose ends here.  A couple of  weeks ago (see how laggy I’m getting?) I was showing how long it takes me to actually finish some of these posts (haha, ironic), and I was telling the story of teaching the vocabulary word brusque. Let us resume the story… …One of the words on said vocabulary pretest was the word brusque.  I’m going over examples (“Think of  the stereotypical New Yorker”) and synonyms (“Kind of like a little pushy and a bit rude”), looking for them to give me the word for the blank on the homework sheet. One kid who really thought he knew that one guesses wrong, and when I give the correct answer, he looks even more puzzled than usual. With this guy, I’ve learned to wait a beat, and then the light bulb usually goes on. Sure enough, his face lights up, and he says, “I thought that word was brewski!” The whole class is dying. “I was wondering why people talked about brewskis all the time. Why would you talk about that? I was very confused. In DARE they talked about brewskis…” O. M. G. So now it’s a

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Friday Follow-Ups

October 3, 2009
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Just some follow-up on some things I noticed I’ve left hanging. *Still haven’t heard from the DA about my possible vandalism charge. Wait…I never finished that story, did I?  (Here’s the beginning of the story.) After the cop came to the school and didn’t get to talk to me, he came to my house the next day, Saturday. I get attitude from the git-go. He says the guy who almost ironed me wants to have me charged with vandalism for making a dent in the side of his truck with my wristguards. Lucky it wasn’t my head, and you’re interviewing me in a hospital bed. Vandalism is a misdemeanor. I won’t go into details, but it wasn’t exactly a pleasant conversation. But the bottom line seemed to be that, with no witnesses except those involved, he had a he said/he said sort of thing on his hands, and was trying to get me to crack and confess. When he left he said he would write up his report, and then the DA’s office would decide whether there was a case or not. Great. The statute of limitations on charging me is two years. The incident was in February. Supposedly, according

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Research This II. (Also: More Obliviousness.)

April 25, 2009
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Yesterday I whined about research papers. But I think I’m starting to get this research thing dialed in a bit.  It all starts with the right questions. Here’s the list from yesterday. We’re trying to decide which ones would be good research-type questions. 1. Why are flamingos pink? 2. Who invented the car? 3. What was the first video game? 4. Is global warming real? 5. Should I buy an Apple or a Windows computer? 6. What other explanations are there for UFO sightings? 7. How many rides have they had in the history of Disneyland, and what are they? 8. Why is the sky blue? 9. Does watching violent media make kids act more violently? 10. Why did the Titanic sink? The Answers: 1. No Dice, Cheese Slice. They eat shrimp. 30 seconds on Google, and etc. No thesis here, let’s move on. 2. Nyet, nyet, Soviet. See #1, except for the shrimp-eating part. 3. Oh Noes! Pong. I had it. It was boring. Still no research questions yet. 4. That’s what I’m talking about. On the surface, a yes/no question, but the research you need to do to come to that answer! 5. Yessss. Again, like #4, it

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Research This.

April 24, 2009
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Raise your hand if you are sick of teaching the dreaded “research paper.” Not to mention having to read the gems you usually end up with. I know,  I know, it’s my job to show them how to find the joy in learning how to research and prove their thesis that dolphins would make a great pet. But after a couple of weeks of pretending that it really matters that you format your work cited entries exactly like the latest MLA standard (God forbid you use the one from two years  ago),  and riding herd on them in the library as they complain that “they don’t have any books on my topic,” I’m ready to chuck the whole thing for a class wiki. I’m thinking next year, I hand the “research unit” off to the social studies department, who always complain that we English teachers don’t do it right. It’s all yours, baby. Every year my list of banned topics gets larger. Here’s this year’s list: No: skateboarding, surfing, snowboarding, particular cars or planes, mass murderers/mafia/criminals, bios of sports stars, celebrities, or rock stars, animals just because they’re cute, video games, Disney or Disneyland, “all about” papers, “history of” papers.

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Random Featured Post

“Do you love me?” (Also: Weird “Week”)

Wotta “week.” Considering how tired I am, I can’t believe it was only a three-day week – for some reason we had a 4-day weekend for Veterans’ day. And I done clean forgot that I was supposed to give the “District Benchmark Test #1″ (that’s a whole ‘nother post) by Friday. So we spent Wednesday darkening ovals to generate data for the district, AND there was a “multi-media” assembly that, amid the rock and rap, touted the beauty of trust and honesty (also: don’t do those things which I obviously can’t mention, because ads for them started appearing here). AND, yesterday was “parent visitation day.” Whole lotta scare quotes today too. Usually I get a pretty good turnout for these parent visitation days (it sounds like a Catholic holiday). Our previous principal (our present principal is an FNG, both to the job of principal AND to our school) instituted these as a sort of PR for parents. Many parents of ms’ers are more than a little leery of sending their little angels to the big bad junior high. (You should have seen the reaction a few years ago when the district proposed making our school 6-8. OMG. You’d have thought [...]

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Mr. Coward has been teaching on the beautiful central coast of California since 1989.

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