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Uh Oh. (Also Cartoons.)

August 26, 2011
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Woo Hoo! The first week is in the books. You gotta love those three day weeks. First week shtuff: I’m a bit worried. I herded them into the computer lab for the STAR reading test today. (Aside: It’s from the same people who make Accelerated Reader. We still have the old version, not the web-based Renaissance Learning version. We’ll have to go to that next year as we migrate to Windows 7, but for now it’s refreshingly old-school. You don’t even get to use your mouse. ) And the bottom line is that I have more kids reading at a 4-5th grade level or less than ever before. But I also have almost as many kids reading at a “12+” level. So while my mean is about 7-8, the reality is that “teaching to the middle” just ain’t gonna work. I don’t have a whole buncha kids actually at grade level; they’re all way advanced (the few who didn’t get siphoned off to “accelerated”) or well below. D’oh. Also, the boy aced it. I haven’t had a PHS (Post High School) instructional reading level in years. Hard to say at this point if that’s necessarily a great thing. Will he

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Failure Story

April 4, 2011
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Usually I like to highlight my many and various triumphs in the classroom, and offer tips for the unwashed masses; you know, success stories. Let’s call this one a failure story. They say that in science, a failed experiment will teach you as much as one that succeeds, maybe more. Hmmm. Let’s hope so. Every year I try to make sure, even though there’s a definite routine I follow, that I still have room to mix it up and try out new material. (Aside: Believe it or not, I wrastled for awhile about where to put the word that in the previous sentence. Wait, I’m talking to English teachers. Of course you believe it. But try it. Should the word that go after the word sure, or where it ended up–after the second comma?) This year, like always, we have the 600 Words/Week going. And, as always, they need something to do while I check on them every Tuesday. Usually what I have done is give them time to write toward next week’s 600 words, and a list of suggested topics that they can do with what they like: use, mutate, ignore, combine, whatever. I don’t care; just write. This year I

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Christmas Stories

December 22, 2010
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I’m on my 16 day weekend. Sixteen glorious days of sleeping in. They say you can’t bank sleep. “They” are wrong. I do it every weekend and vacation, and draw from the bank during the 183 days of working. I go from getting up at 4:30 AM to about 9:30. For me, that’s the best part of vacations. This year the weather gods are not smiling on us. We have gone from 80 degree days a mere week and a half ago to five straight days of rain. Twelve inches of rain and lakes in my back yard. I haven’t missed  four days in a row of skating in YEARS. You call this vacation? I couldn’t imagine living in places where they get real weather on a regular basis. Anyway, before I go into hibernation and start hitting you with reruns  (“If you haven’t seen it, it’s new to you!”), I have a few stories for you. Some of them are even Christmas related, a couple are even mine. (Actually, I started this post last Friday, but…) I usually try to stick with the routine during the  last week before vacation every year. Usually on the last Friday, it’s raining, and

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Shtickmeister!

November 30, 2010
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I’m going to begin by quoting myself. I get to do that because it’s my blog. This one is from fall 2008. One of the things I like to say about teaching junior high is down at the bottom of this page in the footer. You’re too lazy to scroll, aren’t you? Fine. “Five shows a day, 180 days a year.” And there aren’t many crowds tougher than 7th graders. “This is boring.” The worst of all sins. Most of us who teach junior high have a shtick. A role we play, some isms we like to use again and again. Idiosyncrasies we play up for entertainment/attention value (oh the sharing I get when we talk about that word idiosyncrasy during “Monsters are Due on Maple Street“). The key is to make the shtick such a natural part of the classroom routine, that it doesn’t distract too much. Well, sometimes we do need the distraction. Here’s one from earlier that fall, talking about The Outsiders, chapter two. (I guess, given the name of this blog, I should refer to the novel now and then.) …Then we get to how Cherry can actually open up to Pony, unlike around her “friends”

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Free Speech! (Also: Motor Trend)

October 14, 2010
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Free Speech! (Also: Motor Trend)

First off: I’ve been a little scatter-brained lately. My PU’s 50th wedding anniversary party thing is this weekend, and we’re leaving tomorrow for my high school stomping grounds; the suburbs of Sacramento. My dad sent me a load of pics to put together into a slideshow for the party. Most all of them brought back the required memories, but there was one photo that used to be legendary in our family. Sorry if I’m going all “circle time” on you, but I thought I’d share. I always have been a magazine lover, but I’m not really a car fan any more. I’m about 2 or so in the pic. The kids were all, “You were reading when you were two years old?” “Pretending to anyway.” These days I sort of have a phobia about getting my picture taken, so I haven’t had a new pic in the yearbook for 3 years. I was going for having the one from my first year last until I retire, but somehow that one was lost a while back. The yearbook crew ambushed me while I was eating lunch that year, and they’ve been using that one ever since. I tried to get the yearbook

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Random Featured Post

True That.

We had an open mouth quiz on chapter 8 today. One class has several boys who have a new phrase they’re trying out. Personally, I sort of like it. 4) On p127, we get an example of what seems to be foreshadowing. What is it? a) When Two-Bit says that Darry will kill him if Pony’s really sick. b) When Two-Bit says Darry could be a Soc. c) When Pony says he has a helpless feeling. d) When Two-Bit calls Pony chicken. e) When Pony says he’ll be well by tonight. “OK, number four. What’s foreshadowing?” The class takes care of that one for me. Most of them laugh, and one says, “I was wrong.” (Pony’s line at the end of chapter three, and a beauty example for them of foreshadowing.) “Oh yeah. Ok, so it’s C, right?” “True that.” “Number six. Darry, I mean Dally (they always mix up those names), right?” “True that.” (me, doing some “refocusing” of a gentleman off to the side) “‘Clark,’ could you focus your comments on the questions? Open mouth only applies if that mouth is talking about the questions.” “True that.” “And I think we’re done with that line, for today at [...]

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Mr. Coward has been teaching on the beautiful central coast of California since 1989.

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Recent Comments

  • mrC commented on It’s Go Time!@Sarah-Most excellent! Keep up the good work, and don't let any of them talk you out of it. Glad to hear your kids recognize the value too. Fight the good fight!
  • Mrs. M~ commented on Illin’Feel better soon! There is nothing worse than being at school and trying to be "on" when you feel like death.
  • Sarah commented on It’s Go Time!I just came across your blog...I am a second year teacher and I am currently reading The Outsiders aloud to my seventh graders. I read it to them last year, too. I catch a lot of criticism for reading it to them...but they LOVE to have me read to them. I actually had a group
  • joan commented on Illin’I'm on day two of out-with-the-crud. I needed the rest. Hope you're in tip top shape by Monday!
  • mrC commented on “The Sub Used One of Your Sticks!”That one oughta be strung up like they used to do to horse thieves.
  • Heather commented on “The Sub Used One of Your Sticks!”The last sub I had left no note at all and broke the arm of my spinny chair by leaning back in it so far that he fell in the floor. The kids all said he was the best sub ever. I politely asked the school secretary to never have him sub in
  • mrC commented on The Future of Space Travel@Heather: Gawd I hate that. I think I even posted about it awhile back. @Kelli: This reminds me of high school. I went to a Jesuit high school (all boys) and for our Friday football rallies, we would import cheerleaders from other schools to be a part of the rally. And the girls would always begin
  • Heather commented on The Future of Space TravelMy eighth graders just have the habit of prefacing every question with, "I have a question." And announcing "I'm done" when they complete an assignment.
  • Kelli commented on The Future of Space TravelIs it bad that I sometimes start my stories with "Okay, so...."...? I guess the kids have rubbed off on me. Sigh.
  • Kelli commented on Blogging the Scoring Session (Part I)Ugh! Been there. I have been to those "Scoring and Rubric" type meetings in two different states now... Not fun, and not entirely informative, either.
  • Meg commented on No Groove Yet (Also: The Giver and No Homework Returns)There was a district I student taught in that hand the no fail policy. I child could not be held back a grade, even if they did absolutely nothing the whole year, until they were in high school. It took most of the middle schoolers about 3 seconds to realize they didn't have
  • Kelli commented on No Groove Yet (Also: The Giver and No Homework Returns)You know, that whole "no-zero" policy goes hand-in-hand with the "no-failure" or "no-retention" policy, and my school district is a definite contributor to this madness. I can understand the desire to stop giving zeros and MAKE the kids do the work (giving countless opportunities until successful), but I have been in a situation where
  • commented on Obligatory Santa VideoWe have an unofficial "no zero" policy. It takes a little extra effort on the teacher's part to get all of the students to complete their assignments but we have made it work. The thing that was most helpful was instituting a "homework detention" that is separate from discipline detention. If a

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