“Congratulations! You’ve won a free oven mitt!”

Posted on August 25, 2013Filed Under Back to School, The Jerk | 3 Comments

(BTW: This counts for Friday.)

When you give the kids a chance to ask you off-topic questions, they are so bereft of imagination, all you get is a series of  “what’s yer fave?” or “if you could be any…” Gawd. Really?

I rarely give them that chance because, 1) I am a fervent disciple of bell to bell instruction and 2) it’s always like this:

What’s your favorite…

Color? Yellow.

Superhero? Who cares?

Animal? Please.

Food? Pizza (the circle of life), hamburgers (no cheese–don’t you ruin my burger), and pretty much any fried potato product.

Music? You wouldn’t know most of it. I also like country. No, most rap is not music.

Car? They all suck.

See what I mean? It gets old after awhile.

Movie? The Jerk.

Anyway, where this is meandering is one of the great scenes in The Jerk is where Steve Martin’s character Navin Johnson realizes a bunch of cholos in a low-rider are using a stolen credit card. He calls the cops and he’s trying to stall the criminals until the police arrive, and the last tactic he tries is,

“Hey guess what?! You’re our eighth customer today! You’ve won a free oven mitt! Hah, I’ll go get it for you!”

Well Carly over there in the comments section, guess what? You made our 500th comment! You win a free (imaginary) oven mitt!

Signs that things around here this year will NOT be like they have been before:

The new library tech’s (no mo’ real librarians left in the distict–wait, there might still be one) opening day speech to all the seventh graders trooping through was, “I don’t mind talking in the library,” and “I want you to feel welcome here.” OMG.

The new principal drops in on me at lunch to tell me he’s pushing for Minecraft to be installed on our school servers, and he’s “really going to push hard for local control of tech assets; we don’t need them telling us what we can and can’t do.”  Double up: OMG. OMG.

Several of us complained about making the eighth graders walk through a tour of the school on the first day, just like the one they started last year with. It was eliminated. I think I might faint.

Now we just have to get the new guys to understand the importance of a well-fed staff.

 

Comments

3 Responses to ““Congratulations! You’ve won a free oven mitt!””

  1. Mrs. M~ on August 26th, 2013 7:27 am

    Dang, I missed the oven mitt by one post!!!!

    Minecraft on school servers? My daughter is requesting a transfer to your school immediately. It sounds like you have an interesting year ahead! I am curious to hear more about the “no librarian” thing and the repercussions as the years go on.

    I look forward to reading your posts again this year. Welcome back!

  2. mrC on August 26th, 2013 7:19 pm

    @ Heather: I didn’t think of that idea! I was too busy laughing at “open up your air holes.”
    @ Carly: Your point is well taken, but check out today’s story. Good luck with the new year.
    @ Mrs. M: Here’s your (imaginary) oven mitt for being my mostest loyal reader and commenter. Thank you. And my boy is a Minecraft maniac as well. He feels betrayed that this happened the year after he was there.

  3. Carly Sween on August 27th, 2013 12:20 am

    A free oven mitt? Really? Sweet! I just threw one away due to a dog-chewed hole. 🙂 And up here in Alaska, an oven mitt can make a good mitten if you’re in a pinch.

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