Reading and a Rerun

November 28, 2011
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I know, I know. Thanksgiving is over. Time for a new post. Well, I’ve been busy…

I’ve been learning a lot about maintaining a thirty year old pinball machine. And, ummm, playing one.

Digesting food. Seriously. I weighed myself TDay evening, and then again then next morning (barely–it was almost afternoon). Six pounds difference. I don’t know where it goes. Well, I guess I know where at least some of it goes.

Trying to stay ahead of my video class. Since there aren’t as many hardware issues this quarter, things are moving along much more quickly. I have a couple of pairs who are two weeks ahead of last quarter. D’oh.

Enjoying our 70+ degree weather. In November. Sorry. It’s one of the reasons I live here.

Reading. Latest in progress:

  • Damned (narrated from Hell by a 13 year old girl…there are certain contexts when a 13 year old girl’s perspective is the best one to have), by Chuck Palahniuk, the same guy who wrote Fight Club (never read it or seen it… I might now). Damned funny. Sorry.
  •  1Q84 by Haruki Murakami (an epic in three parts totaling 1000+ pages — I’m about 1/4 of the way in). I love his work. It’s just so…so…precise.
  • Dark Tide by Stephen Puleo. Nonfiction account of the Great Molasses Flood of 1919 in Boston. A 2.5 million gallon tank of molasses burst (due to greed and mismanagement), and flooded a whole neighborhood 15 feet deep in molasses. Dozens of people died. Great reading. The company tried to blame it on “anarchists.”

Anyway, I was looking through the archives, looking for something funny that I hadn’t rerun before. Preferably from the early days, so it’s new to some of you.

I found one from January ’09, back when I used to teach Tom Sawyer. I had almost forgotten about this one already. (I guess that’s what happens when you turn fitty. OMG! I’ve started getting AARP mailings already.)

Yesterday, we were going over chapter three, where Tom sees Becky (“The Adored Unknown”) for the first time, and falls in love. He shows off for her and she tosses a pansy over her shoulder. They always ask why he picks it up with his foot.

“Being a boy, he can’t be seen picking up a flower. So he’s trying to be all nonchalant about it”

There are also always some that ask what a pansy is, even after I just get through with my previous response. This time though, a girl in my friendly class says,

“Oh, now I get it. It was a pansy, like the flower. Phew. I was a little worried about this book. I kept wondering.”

“Why?”

“I thought it said panties.”

Let’s all just take a moment to contemplate the reaction a seventh grade class might have to a line like this. Pandemonium.  I counted at least three kids laughing so hard they were crying.  For the rest of the period, once we got back to some semblance of normalcy, there were random giggles and guffaws and lip-biting. Even today,

“Remember yesterday when “Kara” said panties?”

I thought I was going to need a mop for under “Chuck’s” desk.

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Best Faux Pas Ever. (Glad it wasn’t me.)

(Friday Flashback – Last Year) “Mrs. G” has been teaching in our district for over 40 years. She’s been at our school since it opened in 1980. She’s taught English, art, social studies, music, and much more. She is literally an immovable object, and doesn’t need to rise from her chair to strike fear (well, not exactly fear any more, but…) into 8th graders’ hearts. She doesn’t care what people (parents, admins, other teachers) think of her, and speaks her mind whether it’s “appropriate” or not. She currently teaches 8th grade US history, and has been going toe to toe with a particularly pesky student I had last year. Now, this “Steve” sends me e-mails about how the posts he’s reading in the discussion forums on our Moodle don’t have enough thought behind them, and he has a real brain. But he’s a loud-mouthed pain in the rear, whose parents it seems, are wrapped around his finger. I was probably the only teacher he got along with…until Mrs. G. He’s still a pain, and though, like me she recognizes and likes the Steve underneath, she’s not afeared of giving what she gets. So… Food is not allowed in our classooms. [...]

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Mr. Coward has been teaching on the beautiful central coast of California since 1989.

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Recent Comments

  • Kelly commented on “How cute. Like hobos…” (Also: Hank Williams.)I've just discovered your Website and it's been one laugh after another. I teach 7th grade English and we just finished The Outsiders. Now I wish I would have cranked out Hank Williams. The complaints and hysterics would have made my day.
  • Mrs. M~ commented on Rants and RavesThe no-name thing used to drive me crazy too. I finally gave up and now build in an extra minute every single time they hand in papers. As they hand them in row-by-row, I flip through them on the spot. If there is no name on the paper, I have the student
  • mrC commented on Rants and RavesThank you to all for the kind thoughts. Today was the first day in over a week where I was feeling close to being myself. And of course those pesky kids started making me all crabby again. @Mrs. M: I usually admit right up front that I ain't "on," and they'd best be wary of me
  • Meg commented on Rants and RavesI have the same problem with no name papers and it drives me nuts!!! Trust me, if there is someone out there with a good solution let me in on the secret as well.
  • mrC commented on It’s Go Time!@Sarah-Most excellent! Keep up the good work, and don't let any of them talk you out of it. Glad to hear your kids recognize the value too. Fight the good fight!
  • Mrs. M~ commented on Illin’Feel better soon! There is nothing worse than being at school and trying to be "on" when you feel like death.
  • Sarah commented on It’s Go Time!I just came across your blog...I am a second year teacher and I am currently reading The Outsiders aloud to my seventh graders. I read it to them last year, too. I catch a lot of criticism for reading it to them...but they LOVE to have me read to them. I actually had a group
  • joan commented on Illin’I'm on day two of out-with-the-crud. I needed the rest. Hope you're in tip top shape by Monday!
  • mrC commented on “The Sub Used One of Your Sticks!”That one oughta be strung up like they used to do to horse thieves.
  • Heather commented on “The Sub Used One of Your Sticks!”The last sub I had left no note at all and broke the arm of my spinny chair by leaning back in it so far that he fell in the floor. The kids all said he was the best sub ever. I politely asked the school secretary to never have him sub in
  • mrC commented on The Future of Space Travel@Heather: Gawd I hate that. I think I even posted about it awhile back. @Kelli: This reminds me of high school. I went to a Jesuit high school (all boys) and for our Friday football rallies, we would import cheerleaders from other schools to be a part of the rally. And the girls would always begin
  • Heather commented on The Future of Space TravelMy eighth graders just have the habit of prefacing every question with, "I have a question." And announcing "I'm done" when they complete an assignment.
  • Kelli commented on The Future of Space TravelIs it bad that I sometimes start my stories with "Okay, so...."...? I guess the kids have rubbed off on me. Sigh.